Yup, Still Love My Job

Me: Work is fucking chaos today. I'm about to lose my shit.

Curly: What's up?

Me: Holiday madness. Although I did just get this IM from our Project Manager that cracked me up.

Me: "Do you know about the Hidden Fairies and Fairy Tale?"

Curly: That's work-related?

Me: Yup.

Curly: You have the weirdest job ever.

Why I Love My Boss

Two reasons:

1) She is super chill, unlike that high-strung, batty chick I reported to at my last job.

2) She has a very dry sense of humor, which is my favorite kind. (Background: We work for a site focused on astrology, tarot, numerology, etc.) Behold:

Me: The images aren't showing up in preview. Should I let design know, or will they be propped onto the right server prior to going live?

Boss: We are having propping issues.

Me: We're having all kinds of tech issues today.

Boss: Totally. We need to consult the I-Ching.

Overheard at the Office

Guy Who Sits Near Me, To No One in Particular: What's a ball gag?

People Around Him: ... [crickets] ...

Guy Who Sits Near Me, To No One in Particular: It's not something dirty, is it?

People Around Him: ... [crickets] ...

Oh, and Miss Tanya also came over to my desk today and loudly exclaimed, "Did your boobs gets bigger?" My workplace isn't terribly appropriate.

The New Job Evaluation

Pro:
I spent the entire morning writing porny personal essays about my love for macaroni and cheese and mozzarella sticks.

Con:
After spending my morning writing porny personal essays about my love for macaroni and cheese and mozzarella sticks, I had to eat a salad for lunch. Stupid diet.

Paper Trail

My goodness! Getting a new job at a monster-sized company certainly does come with a lot of paperwork. Oh, did I forget to mention that I have a new job? Because I do. And instead of celebrity astrology, I'll be working on food content. Which means less funny work stories and more riding off into the sunset with Tyler Florence. You know, in my head. Actually, I'd prefer Anthony Bourdain, but he's not part of this job.

The good news for you is that I expect to be a lot more motivated going forward, both in work and in life, which means more blog posts for you. Bon appetit!

My Job is Funny

Sometimes, usually when it gets into the realm of celebrity astrology, my job makes me laugh. Today, for example, I was working on a celebrity birthday feature, which requires finding three famous people born on each day of the year. I'm using a few different sites to find the info, and I often put people in as placeholders and replace them later. My most recent replacement?

Osama bin Ladin Carrie Underwood

March 10th, by the way. Also, just to give you a heads up, Mercury Retrograde starts today, which if you don't know, basically means everything's going to be all sorts of fucked up for the next few weeks. Enjoy!

In the Meantime

I'm sick. And busy. I'll be back soon, I promise. While you wait, check out all the pics I took over the weekend. The cherry blossoms were blooming! Because cherry blossoms are dumb.

Also, we've started the countodwn to American Idol and given the Midol blog a new home. And in other reality television news, you should watch The White Rapper Show on VH1. It's pretty much the most genius thing ever.

Now if you'll excuse me, Cameron Diaz's astrology profile isn't going to edit itself.

Happy New Year, Part Deux

So I decided to do nothing to ring in the New Year. It wasn't really all I thought it would be and more. But it was definitely better than that year I got dumped around 11:30 p.m. and was sitting on an N train coming back from Bay Ridge when the ball dropped. Next year, I'm either going to host my own soiree or take a vacation. I'll keep you posted as we get closer to the date. If it's the former, of course you're all invited. Except for you, Weird Guy.

Anyway, I'm back at work today and I'm drowning in a sea of articles that need editing and site statistics that need to be reported. I did manage to sneak downstairs to grab some chicken teriyaki at City 75 for lunch, though.

I get my lunch at City 75 most days, because it's in my building, making it convenient, and it hasn't been completely invaded by tourists over the past couple of weeks. Fucking tourists. As far as mid-town lunch destinations go, it's pretty good. Decent buffet tables, decent pizza, sushi… that's all I need, really.

One thing I never do, though, is look at my receipt for City 75. Today I did. It says this on the bottom.

City 75 restaurant is OPEN!
Lunch served 12pm-3pm
Dinner served from 5pm
Expect the Unexpected…

I have not witnessed this "Unexpected" they speak of. Maybe I'll walk in one day and there will be a unicorn drinking a smoothie and wearing short pants. I can't wait.

Invasion of Privacy

In addition to your run-of-the-mill men's and women's bathrooms with stalls, we have a private bathroom in the office, where employees can go to poop, cry, take drugs or call potential employers on their cell phones. Me, I always check the private bathroom first before heading into the shared one, because I like my alone time.

When I moved into the new office last month, I was excited about three things; a more balanced guy-to-girl ratio, the private bathroom, and sharing an office with Miss Tanya again. We had a private bathroom in the old office, and I sat close enough to make it my default toilet but not close enough to smell what activities my co-workers engaged in while they were in there. In theory, this should have been a good thing. In practice, being the only girl in an office full of guys, and disgusting ones at that, made for pee on the seat, a general state of mess and boys trying to bang down the door every time I was in there, putting a serious cramp in my solitude. I also never discovered the perpetrator of the "if it's yellow, let it mellow" philosophy of bathroom visitation, but I'm pretty sure I hated him, provided he was not the super cute blond with the body piercings.

Anyway, the private bathroom in the new office has a feature the private bathroom in the old office did not have: a Vacant/Occupied sign on the outside, that is triggered by the deadbolt on the inside, airport-bathroom style. Which means no people attempting to barge in on you. Except that it doesn't. And it rattles me, because no one should be trying to barge in on me. It clearly says "Occupied" while I'm in there. In red capital letters. I work for a giant media company, where everyone can presumably read. I have never attempted to barge in on anyone -- I see OCCUPIED and keep on walking, either to the shared bathroom if my bathroom business is business that I care to share, or back to my desk so I can try again later.

Also, there is at least one girl who will wait outside of the private bathroom for whoever is in there to exit. And I don't know about you, but I know what most people are doing in said bathroom, and I'd like some air-out time before entering. What is wrong with people?