Perfectly Nuts

Me: Did I tell you my therapist diagnosed me with perfectionism?

The Former Roommate: You could have just given me the money, and I would have told you that.

Me: I honestly had no idea.

The Former Roommate: You didn’t??? Wow.

Me: No. I thought that perfectionists got more accomplished than I do. Apparently, they swing back and forth between over- and under-achieving, and procrastinate a lot, which is what I tend to do.

The Former Roommate: Um, you kind of have accomplished a lot. You just live in a weird world where being published and graduating from cooking school aren't major deals.

Me: She seemed rather incredulous that I didn’t know that already.

The Former Roommate: That would make two of us.

Me: So now I’m searching Amazon for books on perfectionism, but there are so many, I don’t know which one to buy.

The Former Roommate: You have to buy THE BEST ONE.

Me: I know.

The Former Roommate: So you can work on being THE MOST PERFECT PERFECTIONIST EVER.

Me: That’s the plan! I have a spreadsheet started and everything.