What Passes For Mushy At Chez Cavefish

Me: So what's your plan in terms of officially moving out of here?

The Roommate: Well, were you planning on moving out in September?

Me: Yeah

The Roommate: I'll be moving out then. Or whenever you are.

Me: Are you sure? That's so far away.

The Roommate: No, no, it's totally cool. I can't leave you and Manhattan cold turkey.

Me: That seems silly when you already have a fabulous new apartment in Brooklyn.

The Roommate: I may be excited but I don't do well with change. Seriously, don't make me!

Me: You're evicted! End of the month!

The Roommate: I will miss you too much if I have to leave now.

Me: Don't say shit like that to me when I have PMS. I get all misty and crap.

The Roommate: Oh, sorry. Well, fuck you.

Me: Much better.