Because If My Sharona And I Stop Talking About Boys, The Terrorists Have Won

My Sharona: No McChip since Monday night.

Me: WTF?

My Sharona: He's kinda pulling a Captain Jersey, don't ya think?

Me: I was thinking that yesterday, actually.

My Sharona: Captain Jersey liked you. He was just that stupid.

Me: Yeah.

My Sharona: What did he say at the end that made us plot his murder?

Me: Let me see if I still have the email.

My Sharona: I remember wanting to kick his ass.

Me: "But I'm really sorry that things weren't happening fast enough for you, and that I just don't have enough time (or the personality) to become a full-time boyfriend at the drop of a hat."

My Sharona: Oh fuck.

My Sharona: I hate him all over again.