Won't you be my hunny?

Despite the fact that I have gone on a number of online dates over the years, I'm not what you'd call an "active" online dater. I have a profile up. I log in when someone sends me a message. That's it. I don't search through listings or spend time trying to craft witty introductions. This is probably because I hate dating for the most part, and when my friends bug me about getting "out there" I can say, "I am out there. I'm doing the online dating thing."

This morning, I logged in after receiving an email notification that someone had sent me a message. This is that message, in its entirety:

Subject: Hello looking cute

hey dear.....how r u doin princess i most say u reallylook charming hunny i cant ....believe a lovely pretty lady like u single....i love ur cute smile it almost sent me into heavens when i saw it...i would like to see meet u in person so u can smile for me in person is't that good?......everyman needs a lovely charming princess like u to be with hunny...u got a lovely eyes that could make me vanish within a twinkle of an eyes hunny....i love ur teeths no gaps, ur hair so sturnishing like d lovely moonlight hunny.....i will like to us to talk this over getting to know each other who knows if this special moment might turn destiny....do u have a yahoo messanger?......well here is mine xxxxx@yahoo.com u can add me to ur buddy list so we can talk...hit me back

Good thing mom got me braces at a young age. I've been waiting for the day when I'd be praised for having "no gaps." Also, he lives in Florida and in case you're wondering if I'm mean for making fun of him, yes, English is his first language.