Missing my 20s

You know what I miss most about my 20s? Well, the only thing I miss, actually, because my 20s pretty much sucked, what with the bad boy judgment and the getting laid off every five minutes and the being broke and the crappy friends who I no longer talk to. I already like my 30s way better. The thing I miss about the decade before is that I could go on benders of self-destruction -- eating fast food, chain-smoking, drinking my face off, not sleeping…and even though I felt like ass, I didn't look it. These days, not so much. After a mini-bender, which was all in all pretty sad, I am splotchy and zitty and bloated and I have dark circles under my eyes and I pretty much want to cry every time I look at myself in the mirror. I look like Courtney Fucking Love with red hair.

This weekend? Face mask, eyebrow wax, manicure and pedicure, salads and the gym.