Provisions

You know how different friends serve different purposes in your life?

You have the friend you watch chick flicks with. The friend who gives you all the right book recommendations. The friend you forward emails to from the guy you like for analysis. The friend who tries to fix you up with people. The friend who will say, "He's just not that into you" and the friend who will say, "He's probably just busy with work." (Every girl needs both)

Not to mention the friend who will eat mozzarella sticks and Belgian fries with you at four in the morning. (And while we're on that topic, why is that particular friend always way thinner than you?) And the friend who drags you out to see live music because you'd never remember to go otherwise. And the friend you call when you are crying hysterically because you know that no matter what she's doing, she'll stop to find out what's wrong and try to make you feel better. And the friend who will always hate your ex-boyfriend more than you do.

Me? I'm the friend who takes you to buy your first vibrator. And apparently, your first strap-on, too. Which is odd, because I don't even have my first strap-on yet. But that's exactly what I'll be doing next week with a certain lesbian friend with curly hair and dimples who, you know, hangs out with me all the time both online and off but shall remain nameless and thank goodness no one has any idea who I'm talking about because how embarrassing would that be for her? We'll be hitting Babeland in a big way, and after that, at some point, we'll probably be hitting other things.

Not that I have a willing participant for strap-on activity, mind you, but I find it's best to always be prepared.