An open letter to guys on Nerve Personals who are well out of my age range and live in other states yet still wink at me on a regular basis

Dear guys on Nerve Personals who are well out of my age range and live in other states yet still wink at me on a regular basis:

Hi guys! You've been keeping me up at night, I'm not going to lie. I just don't get what exactly you're trying to accomplish by winking at me.

First of all, a wink is cheap. I don't even respond to guys who live in my neighborhood that wink at me. Even cute ones. I shelled out the not-at-all big bucks to meet people. If you can't even do that, than I'm to assume that, even if you lived in my state and were age-appropriate, I would be paying for drinks or dinner and quite possibly your rent.

On to the age thing, then. My desired age range is 28-38. Now, I know a 27-year old or a 39-year old may try to sneak in there, and I'm fine with that. If I make my parameters 27 to 39, however, guys n their mid-20s and early 40s will try to weasel in, and then we're getting into territory I'm not comfortable with. And 22-year old boy who lives in Orlando that winked at me? Honestly.

I think it's the state thing that baffles me most. Many of you have answered "no" to the relocate option, so what exactly is your intention? That I'll be so moved by your cheap gesture of a wink that I'll immediately pack a bag and run off to Alabama to be with you? Even though you're my dad's age? Really? You think that?

It's occurred to me that you might just want some late-night chat action. Well, guys on Nerve Personals who are well out of my age range and live in other states yet still wink at me on a regular basis, I'm not that kind of girl. Especially when you're 48 and live in Chicago.

In summary, guys on Nerve Personals who are well out of my age range and live in other states yet still wink at me on a regular basis, I don't understand what you're up to. Since it doesn't cost you anything to wink at me, you cheap bastards, and it doesn't cost me anything to ignore you, I guess I'll never know. So carry on then, and I will, too. Freaks.

Love,
Jess