The slut phase

From: Me
To: Petey
Subject: RE: Get Gillian Anderson a sandwich

How was the date?

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From: Petey
To: Me
Subject: RE: Get Gillian Anderson a sandwich

It was fun. There was making out, but she didn't want to come back to Brooklyn.

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From: Me
To: Petey
Subject: RE: Get Gillian Anderson a sandwich

Well, most girls won’t go back to Brooklyn on a first date.

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From: Petey
To: Me
Subject: RE: Get Gillian Anderson a sandwich

Oh whatever, Ms. I Took Home That Player I Met on Nerve and Blogged About It.

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From: Me
To: Petey
Subject: RE: Get Gillian Anderson a sandwich

I was going through a slut phase

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From: Petey
To: Me
Subject: RE: Get Gillian Anderson a sandwich

Why don't I ever meet girls during their slut phases?

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From: Me
To: Petey
Subject: RE: Get Gillian Anderson a sandwich

You met me during one.

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From: Petey
To: Me
Subject: RE: Get Gillian Anderson a sandwich

That slut phase was called "working at [insert silly Internet company name here]" A lot of people went through that phase.