God help me

When it's a friend's birthday and she calls you and says her and another friend who will be in attendance have decided they need to get trashed AND laid tonight and the party kicks off at 7:30 and you were scoffed at when you said you'd happily observe the slutfest but not participate and there's a shady party in the East Village you're going to followed by many bars in the neighborhood, well, I'd say there's cause to be very, very afraid of what's to come.