But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you, not even close…not even a little bit…not even at all

Big sloppy kisses to anyone who knows what movie that line is from.

So I'm bored of Monkey Boy.

Because, you know, I can't be bothered to be interested in someone who's actually interested back. What fun is that? Where's the challenge?

Since The Breakup, I have genuinely liked exactly two boys. They were both unattainable for various reasons and instead of just giving it up I kept recycling them. I'd like one, and then get annoyed, and then move on to the other, and then get annoyed, then go back to the first. I've been doing this for about six months. Clearly, I've been fixating on boys I can't have because I'm terrified of getting into another relationship. And the fact that I can't even be bothered to keep up witty banter with a boy who might very well be dateable is another symptom of my disease.

So I'm taking a boy break. Or rather, that's what I'm saying at This Very Moment. It could last five minutes or it could last five months. That's Big Sweeping Jess Decision #846, by the way.