A tale of two Jess's

Score one for Sensible Jess.

The battle between Sensible Jess and Nympho Jess lasted days, and boy was it ugly. It all started when SJ stated that sleeping with their ex-boyfriend was no longer an option. NJ was understandably upset, and refused to back down. SJ's insistence that they were not good at casual sex, that they were more of a "relationship" girl, that they were raised Catholic for God's sake, was met with fierce resistance from NJ.

And so it went. NJ trying to make plans with their ex-boyfriend, SJ drop-kicking her. Sometimes violence, sometimes pleading (NJ, can we PLEASE for once make a healthy decision?), sometimes playing dirty. Finally, a brutally honest exchange that sealed the deal

SJ: Look, I want to meet someone and fall in love. Maybe get married. Have a puppy. Do all of that sappy, romantic shit that I roll my eyes at in movies but secretly want. It's just, I don't know, depressing to keep having casual sex. It just makes me want what I don't have that much more. Can you understand?

NJ: If we meet someone and fall in love, can we have lots of sex with that person? Can we, you know, do that thing?

SJ: Yes.

NJ: Fine, Ms. No Fun. Break the news. I want no part of it.

And so it went. Sensible Jess broke the news to Favorite Ex, and the girls are celibate until further notice. It's going to be a long, porn-and-sex-toy-filled summer.