A visit to The Bot

I recently received a little postcard in the mail from my gynecologist, informing me that it's time to come in and get a pap smear.

Now, I'm scattered and therefore thankful for the reminders, but does my Evil Mailman need to know that I must make an appointment to have my vagina checked out? I think my Doctor's name without mentioning that she is a gynecologist, and a note to call for a checkup, would suffice.

Anyway, my gynecologist is a brusque female German who speaks in a monotone. Hence, Susanna and I have taken to calling her The Bot.

I went in for my checkup today, and as always, was amused by the decorum. She talks to me for a minute, and then goes into her office and shuts the door while I step behind the curtain to disrobe and put on my blue hospital gown. I then knock on the door to let her know I'm ready, and she comes back in. Now really -- this woman has been staring into my vagina for about four years -- I would be perfectly comfortable simply dropping my pants and hopping up into the stirrups.

Anyway, she took a long look and told me something that no one's ever told me before, in her just-a-hint-of-a-German-accented monotone…

Your cervix looks very nice.