On British boys

Me: Did I tell you the hot British boy likes strap-on sex and also has a Mini Cooper? I think he's my soul mate.

The Roommate: Wow! You didn't know him when you were in London?

Me: Nope

The Roommate: He needs to introduce me to his friends. I'm sure ONE of them has to be hot and want a slutty American burlesque dancer.

Me: He says his friends are all hot. Do we need to take a trip?

The Roommate: Um, yes. But I need proof of hotness. I ain't trekking to England for Spotty McHarelip.

Me: And people wonder why foreign guys think American girls are hos.

The Roommate: Dude, I'm not a ho, I'm just selectively slutty about certain genres of men.