Promos I wish I could write at work, but instead just IM to Brenda

Got vaginal sores? Find out what they could mean you dirty, dirty whore.

Can't say "cock" without giggling? Learn how to talk dirty to your man!

How does your cervical fluid look today? Record it in your fertility chart!

Do you have a big, fat ass? Pick a fucking diet plan, for God's sake!

Are you a hypochondriac? Lucky you -- we've got symptoms for thousands of illnesses!

Not sure if your water just broke? Take this quiz to find out if you're in labor. No, dumbass, don't call an ambulance. Take the quiz!

Is your dog a leg-humper? Find out what you may be doing wrong, you pervert.

Butt ugly? Buy this lip gloss and you'll look just like J.Lo!