Like sands through the hourglass...

Since becoming unemployed, I have contemplated the following careers:

erotica novelist
circus contortionist
fluffer
executive assistant
customer service rep
egg donor
inventor
substitute teacher
drug dealer
real estate agent
freelance writer
corpse on Law & Order
paralegal
pretty foot girl at fetish parties
phone sex operator
bartender
Lifetime scriptwriter
dental assistant
go-go dancer
laundromat owner
massage therapist
research subject
leader of third-wave feminism
cop